Ask Sandy


Dear Sandy,

Do you feel that people have the right to take their own life?

Marc, Glendale, CA.


I believe people do have the right to take their own life. We were ALL given free choice or free will; however one wants to phase it.

I think it is sad and heartbreaking when someone makes the decision to terminate his or her life. We are not in their shoes and we don’t feel the disconnection from life, the pain or the struggle that they have felt. Not the same way that they have experienced pain. We can go through the same experience and anguish that others go though, yet emotionally deal with the experience differently.

Some people I have personally worked with do not, or have never, really felt comfortable on this planet. For whatever reason, the pain or guilt is so strong that they succumb peacefully to the ultimate decision.

Can they be helped? Probably. But are they willing or strong enough to do the work or get the help they need? In many cases, no. Is it selfish for someone to take their own life, or is it selfish for their loved ones to expect them to continue to be miserable? This last option is the only way they know.

I know a few people that take depression medication and simply exist. Emotionally they are numb. They smoke, drink and don’t take care of themselves physically, emotionally or spiritually. By the way, they have already tried to commit suicide. They didn’t want help, and they did not want to change.

Aren’t many of us committing suicide each and every day by, speeding, over eating, drinking, doing drugs, etc.? In many ways most of us are probably committing suicide by not taking good care of ourselves on many levels.

Someone I loved took their own life, and it was devastating. I felt tremendous guilt. But, if that is how the person can find peace, how can I begrudge or feel bad for them? I feel sorrow that I couldn’t help them, and I miss them. We cannot truly help someone that is not open to it, only love them and pray for their highest good and that they find the peace, contentment and happiness that they are looking for. Whatever life lesson’s, they came to learn they will still need to learn – either here or on the other side.


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Account Executive for Glendale, Pasadena, Montrose, La Canada, La Crescenta, Atwater Village, Eagle Rock

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