In the mix: Kim and Kanye’s new baby, a burrito in a bank drive-thru and pussyhats

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This weekend, women took to the streets again for the second year of what’s known as the Women’s March. Men were allowed to participate, but only if the gal didn’t have a GPS….

Actually, the government shut down because they’re afraid of the Women’s March. That’s right! PMS is a powerful thing isn’t it?….

But you know — Actually, I’m sure Donald Trump believes the government shutdown because they’re celebrating his 1-year anniversary as president….

Yesterday, my wife came home from the Women’s March wearing a pink pussyhat. I took one look and she said, “Hey! My eyes are down here”….

A third of voters give President Trump “F” on first-year report card. The other two thirds add a “U”….

Stephen Bannon talked to the House Intelligence Committee the other day. His lawyer says he didn’t mind appearing as long as the drinks are on the House….

Trump’s medical test results have been released. His doctors say his cognition is perfect, and is issued a clean bill of health….

I figured something out: There’s one way Trump’s wall will never get built. Have them buy it from IKEA….

A Florida man was arrested for DUI after ordering a burrito in bank drive-thru. Though when cops questioned him he did spill the beans….

Drone helps rescue teens from surf. “Oh, it was no big deal,” said Ben Stein….

Founders of the state of “New California” declare independence. But first, surf’s up….

In a new poll, 65 percent of Mexicans view the U.S. unfavorably. And once the wall is built, no one will be able to view it at all….

North and South Korea agree to form joint Olympic team, and march together in opening ceremony. For North Korea, it’s the best news since the invention of sliced tree bark….

The temperature in the world’s coldest village, Oymyakon in the Russian region of Yakutia, reached near record lows recently. In fact, it’s so cold, if someone asks you to pull their finger, you’re allowed to keep it….

NY Jets wide receiver Robby Anderson arrested for going 105 in a 45 mph zone. Who says the Jets don’t have anyone fast on the team….

Fan arrested after punching police horse at Eagles-Falcons game. Cops inquire if he’s related to Mongo?….

MLB to implement a pitch clock in 2018. It was that or no spitting and adjusting your crotch, which players vehemently opposed….

NASCAR’s Danica Patrick confirms she is dating Packers QB Aaron Rodgers. He’s something else! Even off the field he’s making passes….

Kim and Kanye name their new baby Chicago West. When they’re eventually done having kids, they’ll finally have a compass….

Howie Fox resides in New York, though his mind can often be found in the gutter. He writes for comedians when not kvetching. He can be reached at


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Comical Week in Review

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