Donald Trump says that China will buy “massive amounts” of US products. I don’t get it? They’re already made in China….
Earlier in the week, a sinkhole developed on White House lawn — which pleased the president, as he got a hole in one….
Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders announces his re-election bid. Let the phlegm begin….
Obamas strike deal with Netflix. Trump sure to undo that too….
Starbucks tells employees, “Anyone can use the bathroom.” And most do after just one cup….
Chili’s 1,650-calorie Boss burger is a massive meat monstrosity. What doesn’t help is employees refer to it as the “Ron Jeremy burger”….
Indra Nooyi is the highest-paid female CEO of a company called PMS. A job no male wanted….
Fleet Week — otherwise known as VD-Day….
Robert De Niro bans Trump from every Nobu restaurant. When asked why, he looked at the reporter and said, “Are you talking to me?”….
Netflix briefly tops Disney as the biggest pure media company in the world by market value. Walt reportedly is so upset, he defrosted….
NFL bans kneeling during the National Anthem. Next, they will attempt to ban players from peeing while sitting….
You know, if Tim Tebow was still playing football, he’d be fined for taking a knee….
Baseball has a new statistic called “Exit Velocity.” It rates the speed in which Mets fans leave Citifield.
Howie Fox resides in New York, though his mind can often be found in the gutter. He writes for comedians when not kvetching. He can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.