Jewish Divestment

Last week my column was in support of Israel and how the tiny Jewish state is being threatened not only by its neighbors, but by an anti-Jewish bias that seems to be sweeping the world, including Europe and the U.S. I mentioned how enemies of Israel have organized Jewish divestment rallies in many countries and even on American college campuses: the idea being to boycott all Jewish products, including anything that was originated by the Jewish people.

Coincidentally, a friend sent me the following list on that very subject:

Any person who wants to boycott all things Jewish should be careful not to get Syphilis since the cure is Salvarsan, which was discovered by a Jew, Dr. Paul Ehrlich. Any person who wants to boycott all things Jewish should not even try to find out whether he has Syphilis, because the Wasserman Test is the discovery of a Jewish man. If one suspects that he has Gonorrhea, he must not seek diagnosis, because he will be using the method of a Jew named Neissner.

If you have heart disease make sure you don’t use Digitalis, a discovery by a Jew, Ludwig Traube.

Should you suffer with a toothache, you must not use Cocaine, a discovery of the Jews, Widal and Weil.

If you have Diabetes, you better not use Insulin, the result of research by Minkowsky, a Jew. If you get a headache, avoid using Pyramidon and Antypyrin, due to the Jews, Spiro and Ellege.

Anyone with convulsions must put up with them because it was a Jew, Oscar Leibreich, who proposed the use of Chloral Hydrate.

And don’t ever get psychoanalysis treatment because Freud, father of psychoanalysis, was a Jew.

If you acquire Diphtheria, you must refrain from the “Schick” reaction, which was invented by the Jew, Bella Schick.

And you’re not allowed treatment for ear and brain damage, since it was developed by Nobel Prize winner, Robert Baram.

Be prepared to stay crippled by Infantile Paralysis because the discoverer of the anti-polio vaccine was a Jew, Jonas Salk.

Don’t use Streptomycin and continue to die of Tuberculosis because a Jew, Zalman Waxman, invented the wonder drug against this killing disease.

Better not use the drug Copaxone immunomodulator for treating multiple sclerosis because it was developed in the Weizmann Institute of Science in Israel by Michael Sela, Ruth Arnon and Deborah Teitelbaum.

Doctors who wish to boycott the Jews must discard all discoveries and improvements by dermatologist Judas Sehn Benedict, or the lung specialist, Frawnkel, and of many other world renowned Jewish scientists and medical experts.

Additionally, to truly uphold a united Jewish boycott, one must avoid using the following inventions (The Encyclopedia Britannica has honored the following Jewish inventors among the Greatest Inventors in the World):

  • * Levi Strauss, Jeans, 1873
  • * Maurice Levy, Lipstick, 1915
  • * Lazlo Biro, Ballpoint Pen, 1938
  • * Edwin Herbert Land, Instant Photography, 1947
  • * Denis Gabor, Holography, 1948
  • * Peter Carl Goldmark, Long Playing Record, 1948
  • * Robert Adler, Television Remote Control, 1950
  • * Paul M. Zoll, Defibrillator, 1952, and Cardiac Pacemaker, 1952
  • * Gregory Pincus, Contraceptives, early 1950s
  • * Charles Ginsburg, Videotape, 1950s
  • * Gordon Gould, Laser, 1958
  • * Stanley N. Cohen, Genetic Engineering, 1973
  • * Jason Lanier, Virtual Reality, 1989

And if you ever get to The Statue of Liberty, skip that famous inscription at its base, “Give me your tired…your poor…your huddled masses…” It was written by Jewish poet Emma Lazarus. And never take the train across the country or buy any goods which are delivered by train because it was a Jew, Theodor Judah, who was chief architect and engineer for the American Transcontinental Railroad.

And stop reading my column.

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