My life has recently played out worse than a bad country-western song.
You know the kind. The cowboy’s truck breaks down, his girlfriend steals his dog, and then she runs off to marry a city slicker.
That’s small potatoes compared to my current events.
I needed something to raise my spirits. A distraction to get me past things depressing.
Then it came to me…donuts.
Just the thought of the doughy delights made me feel better. And the possibility that the lovely Miss K. might be working at the counter filled me with anticipation as much as the jellies, creams and custards.
That was on a Saturday.
On that Sunday the undefeated Los Angeles Rams traveled to San Francisco to play the floundering 49ers.
Full disclosure: I’m from San Francisco and remain 49ers faithful.
But I’m also a realist.
The Rams have been unstoppable and the Niners haven’t been the same since their star quarterback suffered a season-ending injury.
L.A. was coming off of a razor-thin win (23-20) over the Broncos.
An interception, a missed field goal, and 81-yards worth of penalties made it too close for comfort.
In the 49ers previous outing, they held a game-long lead over the Packers and then lost in the final 2-minutes, 30-33.
So San Francisco had the potential to spoil the Rams perfect record like a Bavarian Cream left in the sun.
I entered the donut shop and was immediately lifted by the smell of chocolate and warm sugar.
A sweet voice came from behind the counter, “Sample?” and the charming Miss C. smiled and handed me a warm donut.
Attractive women giving me free donuts? My life was already better.
On L.A.’s first series, Rams QB Jared Goff fumbled a snap and got sacked for a loss…and that was the last lucky break the 49ers had.
San Francisco fumbled away that possession (the first of 4-turnovers) L.A. recovered it, and Rams Kicker Greg Zuerlein (back from being benched by a boo-boo for five weeks) put up the first points of the game on a field goal.
The delightful Miss M. began boxing of my donut order, and wisely suggested I make it an even dozen.
Miss M. has a good head on her shoulders.
But what followed on game day was beyond the comfort I could find in a day-old Cruller or any solace supplied by a dry Maple Bar.
The Rams dominated both sides of the ball.
They scored a touchdown, blocked a punt, scored a safety, put up a field goal, intercepted a pass and scored again.
Just before halftime, the 49ers finally made it into the end zone.
But it was kind of like dunking a stale donut.
It just didn’t taste that good.
San Francisco only managed a single field goal for the rest of the game.
And that was like the “dunked donut” breaking apart, splashing into the coffee and sinking to the bottom of the cup.
It just didn’t look that good.
Final score, 39-10.
Fans of the 49ers may want to purchase their breakfast pastries on game day…donuts probably pack more consolation when they’re fresh.
The Rams hosted the Packers last Sunday and things looked bleak, right away.
Green Bay held L.A. scoreless for the first 27-minutes. The Rams defense put up a 2-point safety.
Los Angeles scored in the last 21-seconds of the half but failed on the 2-point conversion. They hit the locker room trailing, 8-10.
The Rams took the lead in the third quarter, only to lose it in the fourth.
Just before the 2-minute warning L.A. took the lead with a field goal, 29-27.
The Packers had beaten the Niners in the last 2-minutes, and Green Bay’s Kicker has a career long of 58-yards.
Fortunately, L.A. forced a fumble on the kickoff return, recovered it and ran out the clock for the win.
The lovely Miss K. came to the counter as I was paying. It was the perfect icing on donut day. The smiles from the trio were the sweetest things in the shop.
I guess if you’re a Rams fan, every day feels like donut day.
God bless and many thanks to Mary for the suggestion.
Mark Felicetti refuses to disclose where he gets the donuts…and the smiles. Reach him at email@example.com.