Boxing takes it on the chin from judges and yelling ‘fire’ not the worst thing to happen in a theater

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Rams

I attended “Love Never Dies.” That may be true…but it killed me.

Bored to death.

A case of ho-hum-icide.

This sequel to The Phantom of the Opera was vacuous. No heart or soul. The book, music and lyrics were all empty of the emotions that permeated the original.

Epic unfulfillment. It was a black hole, into which a tragic love story disappeared.

Andrew “Void” Webber phoned it in.

I spent a chunk of money on a total disappointment.

And that might be how the Los Angeles Rams will feel about acquiring Defensive Tackle Ndamukong Suh.

Drafted by the Detroit Lions (2010-2014) he’s been with Miami for the past three seasons.

Suh is the poster child for unsportsmanlike conduct and dangerous, cheap shots.

Named one of the “Top 5 Most-Hated Players in the NFL” Suh’s been voted “Dirtiest Player in the League” multiple times. He must be proud.

Suh was fined eight times and suspended twice.

That was just in Detroit.

He’s purposely stepped on Aaron Rodgers’ leg, nearly dislocated Tom Brady’s shoulder, and twisted Andy Dalton’s helmet around like he was unscrewing a bottle cap.

On Thanksgiving in 2011, Suh repeatedly bounced a player’s helmet on the turf, before standing over him and stomping on the guy’s arm.

That’s not football…that’s assault and battery.

One year later Suh “remembered the Holiday” by stomping another defenseless player; and the “season’s greeting” the following Thanksgiving was kicking a quarterback in the crotch.

Because DT’s Aaron Donald and Michael Brockers are already performing well in their respective positions, Suh will move to Nose Tackle.

There isn’t much doubt he could be prolific in the new settings…but that won’t change this skunk’s stripes.

I cannot tolerate poor sportsmanship and pathological cheaters repulse me.

If those old-school values bother anybody, they can chew rocks.

I’d also suggest they evaluate their own character, realign their moral compass, and stay away from sports until they’ve “recalculated” to a correct position.

Suh’s violent acts are indefensible and a team that spends big bucks on a player who is that empty and devoid of humanity will probably get the same in return.

For the Rams, Suh might become the equivalent of my Pantages’ ticket-stub.

I threw it away before I was out of the lobby.

Boxing

Even if you crave knockouts, last Saturday’s main event in Vegas might have been compelling enough to assuage your desire for induced delirium.

Erislandy Lara placed his WBA and IBO titles on the line, and undefeated Jarrett Hurd anted up his IBF belt in a World Super Welterweight title unification bout.

Southpaw Lara went to the body early, while Hurd was trying to find his distance and timing.

Hurd began to utilize his size and reach in the middle rounds, consistently pushing forward and landing with authority.

Lara delivered an uppercut and several straight lefts that would have sent a lesser man to the floor and Hurt’s stiff jabs and wicked hooks would’ve been a ticket south for weaker warriors.

They’re both gristle-tough.

There was more infighting as they began to tire in the later rounds. But the quality of the competition remained top-shelf and their toe-to-toe exchanges were heroic.

Hurd really let the leather fly in the final frame…and it’s a good thing he did. Landing a crisp left hook Hurd put Lara on all fours, and collected a 10-8 round.

Lara got up and the bout went the distance.

Hurd had thrown more, landed more and had superior pepper on his punches. He set the tempo and pace, and continually marched forward.

He should have held (at least) a three-point advantage.

But those idiot adjudicators nearly screwed Hurd out of his rightful victory.

Two scored it 113-114 for Hurd, the third judge gave it to Lara, 114-113.

That knockdown eked out the split-decision win…. and Jarrett Hurt (22-0, 15 KO’s) correctly collected all three titles.

God Bless and “Devil Take the Hindmost.”

Mark Felicetti is an avid theatergoer. Reach him at mark@tolucantimes.com.

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